First, Just Be Still and Listen

By D. Kenyon Williams Jr. 

“First, just be still and listen” is the opening advice from the grandfather in The Treehouse, a novel by Naomi Wolf. “It is a disaster that we are losing the option of silence – with all these televisions, all these channels, these devices you carry that constantly interrupt you. ... The very first lesson to a young poet, or anyone starting in on creative work, is this: go somewhere quiet and listen inwardly. What you hear internally might completely surprise you; and it will not be true unless you hear it first internally.”

Several years ago, my three oldest grandsons decided that I needed to build a treehouse for them at our home in the country. As I began looking for building plans for treehouses that might be adapted to the configuration of trees near our home, I stumbled across The Treehouse. It is a loosely biographical story of an independent-minded woman in her 40s reconnecting with her 80-year-old father, who is both a poet and a quasi-mystical figure. The woman asks her father to teach her how and help her build a “treehouse” for the woman’s child/the father’s grandchild. What she is really seeking is a place and time to “be still and listen” – a refuge from the hectic and combative world in which she is living.

The book was a difficult read for me because of all the poetry incorporated into the novel (as mentioned in an earlier message to you, my engineering and law school education did not train me to understand and appreciate poetry). One reference that did call to me was William Wordsworth’s 1802 poem, “The World Is Too Much With Us,” which reads, in part:

The world is too much with us; late and soon,

Getting and spending, we lay waste our powers:

Little we see in Nature that is ours;

We have given our hearts away, a sordid boon!

But the grandfather’s initial advice, “be still and listen,” reminded me of one of my favorite ancient wisdoms: “Listen to advice and accept instruction, that you may gain wisdom in the future.” That advice is also an iteration and echo of one of my persistent (and futile) complaints, i.e., the loss of time to reflect. Before facsimile machines, scanners, emails and text messages, lawyers crafted letters and documents through a process that, of necessity, included drafts and redrafts and time to reflect upon the words before transmitting the product by mail to the recipient. With the accelerated cycle of work and client expectations of immediate responses that have become the “new normal” for our profession, the time to reflect has been lost. In my experience, the potential for error and a lower standard of craftsmanship has been the result of that loss.

In the novel, the treehouse is an allegory for a place and time to be still and listen. Twice this year, I have had the honor to address the 2025 new admittees to our association, along with the swearing-in ceremony attendees who love and applaud the admittees in their new profession. For those few moments and in that place, those present had an opportunity to be still and listen to the wise advice of Chief Justice Dustin P. Rowe to “return your phone calls.” Less sage but heartfelt were my following thoughts shared with those who attended, which I now share with you.

In my opinion, the profession of law is the most advantageous profession on Earth! The learning process trains us to solve problems in a variety of life situations. It gives us great opportunities to do so many things our fellow citizens cannot. In addition to having opportunities to positively impact our laws and society, we also have the opportunity to help people – to do the greater good! Each of you has an individual and unique opportunity to make a real difference in the world.

With regard to doing good in your new career, I want to encourage you to look to the less populated areas of our state for such opportunities. Oklahoma has at least 14 counties with six or fewer attorneys. Coming from a rural county and a small community, I can speak from personal experience when I tell you that there are many professional advantages to being one of a very few attorneys in a county. A smaller community is also a great place to raise a family, have a less stressful life and be connected to that community in a way that is difficult in a large community. If you come from such a community, please consider returning. If you are not, please consider it. The OBA is looking for ways to incentivize attorneys to serve the underserved communities and would love to hear from you.

On a different but related topic, it is absolutely necessary that we have civility and professionalism in our profession. We live in a society that sometimes seems to be broken or fractured when it comes to civility. The default for many citizens today is to be offensive in their speech and attitude when responding to those with whom they disagree. Attorneys live with disagreement every day – we thrive on disagreement! Disagreement is what we do; we debate, and we argue, and for litigators, we try cases in front of judges if we cannot reach a resolution by agreement. The important difference between us and our society is that we walk away from these debates, arguments and trials having listened to those who oppose us, having learned from our opponents and having conducted ourselves in a civil and professional manner. I cannot stress enough the importance of your adoption early in your career of a personal commitment to be both civil and professional in all that you do.

I would like to share some thoughts provided by members of the OBA Board of Governors at a recent meeting. I asked the governors for advice that, if they could go back in time, they would give to their younger selves at the start of their careers. Here are a few of those thoughts:

• Believe in yourself.
• Spend more time with your family.
• Take time to reflect before responding.
• Enjoy each stage of your career.
• Take it on faith that there are many paths to the career you can find rewarding.
• Be patient.
• Fight the urge to respond in anger.
• Sometimes it is better to listen and say nothing.
• Try to understand your audience when framing your message.
• Do not let your soul die.
• Do not be tacky.
• Be civilized in your speech – not strident.
• Be willing to stand up to your clients.
• It is ok to not know the answer – do not be embarrassed to ask someone who does.
• If a client wants to bring suit on principle, get a large retainer.
• Where appropriate, socialize more with opposing counsel and judges.
• Let your word be your bond – character matters.
• Your career and life will go by quickly.
• Recognize that right now, you do not know how to practice law. Become educated in subject matter and procedure!
• Practice in an area where you have talent.
• One of the few perquisites of private practice is your ability to fire a client.
• Keep your priorities straight. Consider this order: faith, family, country and clients.

I congratulate each of our association’s new admittees who entered practice in 2025, and to them and all OBA members, I wish each of you a very long and satisfying career. Thank you all for your service to the legal profession!

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Originally published in the Oklahoma Bar Journal – OBJ 96 Vol 9 (November 2025).

Statements or opinions expressed in the Oklahoma Bar Journal are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect those of the Oklahoma Bar Association, its officers, Board of Governors, Board of Editors or staff.